BibleBoy's Blog: September 2005

Friday, September 30, 2005

Well VA does it again......

My sammy did not pass emissions in VA and I was given an estimate of $900 to fix. Wanna talk about being pissed off? A perfectly good vehicle I can't use because VA wants more money. My waiver would be $620 so why do that and have it fail next time too? My long term plan was to get a Jasper engine for it which is about $1900 .... So dad is meeting me at my apartment and I'm gonna sign the title over to him. Since I'm with geico now, dropping the insurance on that car will save me money. It is at my dad's house now. We will decide later if dad is going to register it or just title it. It may pass emissions in PA. I dunno.... But it makes more sense to wait for a Jasper engine before I put half the cost of the engine into fixing emissions. Maybe ill soon move to a state that doesn't have emissions? Oh well.... Life goes on, right?

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2 Corinthians 9:7
Every man according as he purposeth in his heart, [so let him give]; not grudgingly, or of necessity: for God loveth a cheerful giver.

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I fully realize that God knows my heart and that that's what is important but right now it is such a struggle for me not to feel insignifgant..... When I'm surrounded constantly by the notion that my thoughts, ideas, and feelings are the least of importance, it makes it hard. I'm a voice that needs to be silenced - at least that's the attitude I always get.

I'm trying.... And I will continue to try my best.

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We are now on our way out of LA and heading back to VA.

I certainly did not sleep well last night. I guess there is just so much on my mind.... I really don't know where anything is headed in my life.

And this morning I wake up and see messages from tanya that say she needs help with her computer.... Then she goes on to say that she is sorry for being so distant. This so much adds to what I feel: that I'm a good friend when someone needs me. The thing is, if it wasn't for Patti, I wouldn't have seen Eli at all in about 2 months. I just don't get it.... I'm more than happy to help anyone and everyone.... I just wish I had a little more support.... But God will sustain me..... I just wish that I didn't feel used all the time. Thankfully I know this New Orleans trip was appriciated by so many people.

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Thursday, September 29, 2005

Now that this part of my life is ending, I can't help but wonder what is next. Some amazing things were shown to me down here. The church we were working with down here is currently working with another pastor - the plan is a city wide church.... Different meetings with different styles (baptist, pentecostal, etc) but one unified church.... Its the book of acts in action and its been my prayer forever.... I also found that this church has a member that was ex-homosexual and has contacts with many homosexuals..... Wow.... Anyone seeing something else? Mix that with my intrest in the supernatural and the fact that new orleans has a lot of demon-related things..... Well... I just wonder why I am here right now. What is my future? I don't know.

A lot has been going through my mind..... I'm worried about a lot of people around me...... The phone call from my aunt is still going through my mind.... The problems tiff is having is going through my mind..... The pain of new orleans is going through my mind.... My own financial problems..... And of course VA inspection and my sammy are not getting along...... I'm just so concerned about so much.... And I wish I could cuddle up with someone and be told that its going to be ok... To be told "i love you" .... I long for a lot but I try my best to wait on God. And until the desires of my heart come true (and of course after), I will do what the Lord asks of me.

I wonder what state I will live in next and who will next tell me they love me.... If either are applicable.

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We have finished our last project.... I really wish we could do more but I think we all have worn ourselves completely out.....

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Another job completed.... Now on to another house to do some inside cleaning.......

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Me and Pastor Rick

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Pastors work hard too (Rick Grover - Pastor of Journey Christian Church, New Orleans)

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The results of our work..... Of course phil is trying to remove the stump.... But not really getting anywhere :)

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Our small job for the morning

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We are getting started already.... Working on a small job.... And it amazes me as to what I am calling a small job now :)

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Wednesday, September 28, 2005

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We got a lot accomplished today and I have the tiredness to prove it. We finished up gutting the house we started yesterday and then moved on to help another person finish removing dry wall, clean debris, mend a fence, and so on. While I was picking up debris from around the yard and road, it really hit me. I started picking up Christmas cards.... Picked up some school work from what seemed to be elementary.... But when I picked up the little baby shoe I almost cried. Who knows what house that even came from but it helps you realize that this wasn't a disaster that just affected one age group - it affected everyone. After we got a good start on that house we moved to another family that had a tree fall on their air conditioner unit and also had some holes in her roof. Greg put a tarp on the roof and the rest of us started chipping away and the tree. Most of its gone but we are going to stop by tomorrow and clean up a little.

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Finished job #2

Another project complete. The owner of this house told us that she is definately opening it up to others who need housing. I remember Clay Walker's (?) song "The Chain of Love" .... Its amazing the need already and we can only fathom what the need will be when they open the city. I'm just glad we are touching people that will touch more people.

Posted @ 11:36 AM // 0 comments // View Links // Create a Link //

We're up for another day. I'm not sure how well I slept last night - there is just so much on my mind. I'm hoping that in the next half hour my energy joins me. There is no words to describe how much work needs done here. God said that He will be our strength and that is the only way I'm able to function.

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Tuesday, September 27, 2005

We got a lot accomplished today and the service tonight was really cool.... But I'm drained... And I just now turned on my phone and had a message that indicates something else is wrong..... I have nothing left to give.... Making it through one day down here is more than I can handle.... But it is these people's lives right now. The work ends for me in a few days but goes on for those that live here..... I just wish I could help more down here and more with all my friends and family that are hurting.

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We took everything out except the kitch..... Oh, wait.... We took that too.

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I'm feeling a lot better today - thanks Steve.

We are finished gathering supplies for the day and on our way to work and thankfully we are all refreshed and no longer dehydrated - more water drinking today I think :)

Todays plan is to finish clearing what we cut of the tree and then heading to a house that basically needs gutted because of water damage and now lots of mold growth. We have our masks and such..... Should be another long day. Thankfully we are going to a church service tonight at 6 so that should be refreshing.

Thanks again for all of your continued prayers.

Posted @ 10:25 AM // 0 comments // View Links // Create a Link //

Monday, September 26, 2005

I wish the world was able to respond to problems the way the people down here have. I'm starting to take some things pretty hard and I just got a call from a friend from back home that is having some real issues and not taking them well. I feel so incredibly helpless. I want to give so much but I just don't have anything to give. I am such a worthless person and it really starts to make me wonder why God has *ME* down here.

I've had a lot on me and on top of the dehydration, I'm just a wreck. I'm gonna get to bed here I think. I'm honored that I am here to do what I can so I'm going to try to make the best of the next 4 days.

Posted @ 10:23 PM // 1 comments // View Links // Create a Link //

Touching lives

We have finished for the day. Working all day still left me feeling meaningless because of the amount of work here. One tree consumed our whole day and we still have some work to do on it. Multiply one tree by how many trees that are here..... This city is going to be rebuilding for years.... And i havent even seen downtown.

But it was when we finished up that i realized that maybe to someone we are worth something. Keep in mind that the root system of this tree is still there as well as most of the trunk... the yard is a mess. We called the lady that owns the house and told her we were leaving so she came over.... We took her to her backyard and she broke into tears and started hugging us and thanked us. Im glad to see us at least making an impact.... Its just so hard to realize it because of the amount of work that needs done.....

Currently i am dehydrated so if you could keep that in your prayers, i would appriciate it. This isnt typical work for a geek.....

Posted @ 6:28 PM // 0 comments // View Links // Create a Link //

Bonfire anyone?

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What a job

So far we temporarily lost someone to heat exhaustion and we lost a
chain saw. There is so much work to do here it is unbelivable.... All
of us just want to keep pushing on but I think we are all going to leave
this project soon.... We may start another small project.... We'll see
what happens. Thankfully one of our team members used to live in miami
so he has hurricane experience and another team member is a carpenter.
The good news is that most of the tree is gone.

Please continue to keep us in your prayers.

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God Provides

It was pretty amazing.... We sat down to break and figure out what we should do for lunch and a car pulled up and asked if we wanted some hot jumbalaya..... Its awesome to see everyone pull together.... Instead of people saying they have nothing to offer, they are being creative. There is so much work here it is just unbeliable and we arent even in downtown.... Part of me would like to see downtown and the other says no way.... But the reality is that it is a restricted area so we more than likely are not able to.

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Starting work

Our first project is starting now. Very large tree cut power to a
severly damaged house. Pictures later. We will be working with chain
saws and sweating very much. Please pray for our safety.

Posted @ 12:37 PM // 0 comments // View Links // Create a Link //

Sunday, September 25, 2005

Well we have electricity. Its really kind of interesting in that some houses were barely damaged at all and then the house next door is completely unlivable.... We see damage but we probably not see the worst of it. Almost no one here has seen downtown.... People who have knowledge of the situation say there still bodies floating down the street..... Sometimes you think you have it bad. I feel almost meaningless down here because I don't think I have the skills I should have..... But even if it's typical grunt work, these people need the help.

We are gonna eat in a little and then get some sleep. We have a meeting at 10am and we will come up with a plan then.

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This is the 5 of us at the church we are meeting at - note the lack of carpet.

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Just one shot from about 45mins out of New Orleans. These houses are raised but most of them have the water level above the bottom of the actual structure. Many exits off of this highway are closed because they are under water. One exit was open but vehicles are driving with the water to the floor boards. Its truly eye opening - and sad.

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We have arrived at a town in mississippi and stopped to get some
supplies and food.... But we are actually seeing the result of katrina
as wal-mart had a lot of things that were out of stock. We were driving
around a neighborhood and the most common sight is piles of wood and
still a fairly large collection of downed trees. This town has
recovered but at almost a month later, the effects are still seen.

As far as we know right now the downtown area of new orleans is under
water and a restricted area. The suburb we will be working in is still
accessible but definately in need of help. And by the way, I know
people like to track weather (*cough* my dad *cough*) so a zip code that
is around the area that I will be working is 70001.

Please continue to keep us in your prayers.

Posted @ 12:17 PM // 0 comments // View Links // Create a Link //

We are currently in mississippi.

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Just crossed into Alabama.

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Saturday, September 24, 2005

Well I have finished what I needed to at work just in time :)

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I've got to learn not to procastinate :)

fortunately my team decided to leave a little later anyway so that's good. I'm finishing some stuff up at work and then I'm heading over to meet up with one of our members. We are loading one van and then we will meet up with the other van and we'll be on our way ... Hopefully by 6.

Please continue to keep us all in your prayers.

Posted @ 3:14 PM // 0 comments // View Links // Create a Link //

Weather for the general area I will be in

In a little over 12 hours my team will be leaving for New Orleans. Rita is definately having an effect on New Orleans but at the current moment, it should not affect the plans in our focus area. Please continue to keep us in your prayers!

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Friday, September 23, 2005

I am going to set up an email list for anyone who wants to be included. Provided that I have access to some type of communication, I will use this address to send updates as well as possibly pictures to everyone on the list.

If you want to be included, I need you to let me know. Please email me and let me know what email address you would like me to put on. I need to have this set up before I depart so please let me know before 1pm tomorrow so I can add you.

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In the last hour I have been hit so hard that it is not even funny. Work was just absolutely nuts for the first couple hours I was here.... things going every which way and I dont know if anyone knew which end was up. In amongst this I get a voicemail from my aunt.... I dunno what happened back up in PA but she seemed upset and was almost chewing me out.... this happened 10 mins after I got a call from the garage to tell me that my Samurai not only failed emissions but it also failed safety inspection.... And as of this point, I still dont have the money to get the protective gear that I need to go to LA with.

What doesnt kill you only makes you stronger..... and I am holding on to that. In fact, all of this really leads me to believe more that God truly does want me in New Orleans. Forget about all the miracles that happened, history proves that anytime your about to do something for God, thats when satan attacks you as much as he possibly can.... and that is what I am counting this as. Sure, I feel like I'm going to break into tears at any moment.... but thats not what matters. What matters is *I* am not broken... and I *AM* going to New Orleans and I *WILL* do God's will!

Please continue to keep me in your prayers.... there are some very trying things going on right now.

Posted @ 6:31 PM // 0 comments // View Links // Create a Link //

I just want to be a kid again.... is that possible? Please?

I'm so tired of always having the lowest paid job possible and not being able to afford to take care of myself. I'm leaving tomorrow for New Orleans and currently I have past due bills and have no money to get the protection stuff that I need such as masks, respirators, gloves, etc.....

I'm about ready to break down into tears.... I want to help people but I dont even make enough money to help myself :(

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Stadia/Journey Christian Church Relief

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Thursday, September 22, 2005

Scrap that last post... Ill be going to new orleans this weekend.

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Well, we needed another twist, right? :)

With the concerns of the hurricane coming in to the new orleans area as well as transportation issues and, in my case, funds, we MAY be splitting the team going down and myself and another person or two may go down the following weekend instead of this weekend. Please continue to keep this in your prayers. It might create a good relief for me and give me time to get stuff together.... but yet, I want to do what God's choice is so if He decides for me to go down this weekend, then so be it. Nothing set in stone yet -- just another request for a more specific prayer!

Thank you so much for everyone's support regarding this. I will continue to keep you posted!

Posted @ 5:22 PM // 0 comments // View Links // Create a Link //

Anyone that says life doesn't come at ya fast needs to walk in my shoes for a week :)

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