Sunday, October 17, 2004 |
(C)2003-2008, Bob K Mertz - Some Rights Reserved |
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Bob, being a fellow manic depressive & married to one I know how you feel. It's so much easier to hide away from the world when you're alone. But it's in that isolation we get those crazy ideas that our lives don't matter. Then as we dwell on the pain it intensifies until it doesn't matter if we live or not. Not always suicidal but just kinda hoping to crawl in some dark hole & sleep until there's a better day. Of course reason says if you're sleeping how are you going to know it's a better day. LOL! But who ever said MD was rational? But force yourself to go eat at a soup kitchen & visit a mission & notice the needs. See something you're good at, jump right in & help. Very few will object. You have to climb outside yourself. Don't know why it works. But it does. There are worse things than being alone. It took a really wrong marriage to prove it to me. I was alone for the better part of 5 yrs. & in several bad relationships just to keep from being alone. It was when I made up my mind I was going to quit focusing so much on finding someone & turned my attention to others & improving my life things began changing. It sounds like pop psychology until you get it out of your head & into your heart. But it's true. Life really is worth living despite the suffering. Oh btw I say Go Bush,too.
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