Friday, June 26, 2009 |
I wish I was an asshole
I think the primary problem with the subject of this blog post isn't the content of it but rather the fact that this world forces people into that statement. Our world is going more and more downhill and it's been documented, planned, and pushed forward towards that than some people realize. Just sit back and think about it.... we're supposed to work together on everything and be a team.... its taught to us by people above us constantly..... almost every employer has those signs hanging somewhere or at least pushes that statement -- and statement is really the best way to describe it because how many of us actually know of employers that show that in their own day to day operations? It sounds really good to say that you support team work but it's really easier to work towards you own personal profits if you leave that part out.....In my daily life I continue to be as helpful and kind as I can be and most of the time I get punished for it.... I'm still single but yet I'm told by lots of girls that I am so sweet and such a great person which is followed by them talking about their asshole boyfriend which she someday breaks up with and then finds another asshole boyfriend..... so why am I single? Well, it simply seems that a big reason is that I am NOT and asshole. Or how about trying to make things better for someone or something? I enjoy going the extra mile and helping people out but what happens if it steps on someone who just happens to like doing things the way it's always been done no matter how inefficient it is or how many people are put in danger or many other various reasons? Well it's obvious -- I get punished for it. Perhaps the saddest part about all of this is that if I were, in fact, the asshole then it wouldn't hurt nearly as bad as it does....... ..... it's hard to hurt if you can't feel anything :( Labels: emotional pain, psychology, relationships, single, society, work (C)2003-2008, Bob K Mertz - Some Rights Reserved |
Saturday, February 14, 2009 |
Singles Awareness Day 2009
 It's upon us again.... Singles Awareness Day. This is the day that all of us single people are made fully aware of our single status. Some enjoy this and celebrate this day and others are just painfully reminded that they are alone, typically those of us "Nice Guys" who happen to fit what women say they are looking for only to be left behind those guys that women "can't stand". I actually have a lot that I don't like about "Valentine's Day" and my main opposition to it is that it's a false holiday. What I mean by that is we are supposed to love one another all the time but yet we have to have a holiday to celebrate this? If you look at many relationships you'll find that Valentine's Day is a day where the fights stop and "love" is put in the air which shows a falsehood as to what the relationship really is based upon. Using this same logic I propose that we declare one day a year as "Golf Day" and that day every man goes out to golf. Sounds like a great idea right? What happens in the month that leads up to that day? Those wives that don't like their husbands going to golf will say "hey, you have golf day coming up, wait till then". Sure, this is a humorous look but the same line of thought seems to sneak it's way into Valentine's Day as well, although in a slightly different manner. Another horrible thing about the holiday is commercialization. Around Christmas there is always the thought of the Jewish kid that doesn't get to enjoy Christmas like everyone else. That thought wouldn't even exist if Christmas wasn't so commercialized. Everyone's beliefs and feelings are the most important thing but when you commercialize something you end up putting the focus on something else. Society makes Christmas a day when EVERYONE has to give and receive presents and the stresses that go along with that are added to everyone so much to the point that no one seems to remember what Christmas is really celebrating. Because Valentine's Day is such a commercialized holiday, the same thing occurs between couples. Now the pressure is on to find the perfect gift or make the perfect moment happen that it's forgotten about what the holiday is supposed to be celebrating... then you add to that those that are single and made to be left out of the commercialized idea of what the holiday is. I guess, all in all, there really isn't anything that one can do. Valentine's Day is going to continue to exist and people are going to continue to live the way they live. We can only hope that more people would start to realize the importance of love all year around and stop feeling the pressures that mean this day has to be something different. Sure, love really is in the air on this day -- just not any more than any other day of the year. There's just a little more pressure to be something that you may not really be. Labels: lonely, love, single, singles awareness, society, valentine (C)2003-2008, Bob K Mertz - Some Rights Reserved |
Tuesday, January 15, 2008 |
Singles Awareness Day 08
Well, it seems the thought of that evil holiday that rolls around in February is starting to creep up so its about time for me to roll out the decorations.Happy Singles Awareness Day Labels: lonely, single, singles awareness, valentine (C)2003-2008, Bob K Mertz - Some Rights Reserved |
Sunday, October 07, 2007 |
Quite frankly, a lot of very strange things have been happening with me recently. I can't say any of them are bad but there is definately something different about me. I really do feel like God is about to push me in some new directions and, while this can sometimes make me nervous, I think it often makes those around me more nervous :) It seems when I hit situations like this it requires a huge leap of faith and is almost always something that defies logic. I often face people that lecture me and tell me how off-course I am.... I face people that run in fear because they want to defend me to the latter but they just aren't able to justify it themselves.... I have people that run away just because they don't want to deal with anything.... What I think the scariest part about this is is the fact that no one is ever really there to support me. Sure, God's in it.... but as far as anyone around me, it's all about second-guessing my actions, my beliefs, my intelligence.... What is really starting to get me is that over these years I've grown used to doing this stuff on my own (don't lecture me - I know God is in it - I'm reffering to physical surroundings) and it seems like I'm just training myself to be alone. I'm not fond of it.... I'm not fond of living in this awesome house by myself. I love where I live and I love helping people and being around people but the situations that I have been led in to and the (no doubt God-given) decissions that I have made have really pushed me away from... well, that's just it - I don't know. The only thing I'm really sure about is that being alone is something that is becomming a part of my life and I don't like it one bit. I don't know where my life is about to go.... I never really do. I just really hope that maybe this is the change that God does that involves me actually finding someone who cares for me and wants to be around me and help me as much as I help her. There are plenty of people in my life for that I care for whole-heartedly but maybe sometime soon I will find the one that not only will do the same for me but actually DESIRES to do it. Labels: changes, companionship, lonely, love, relationships, single, worth (C)2003-2008, Bob K Mertz - Some Rights Reserved |
Thursday, February 15, 2007 |
Time to go to bed and end it for now..... (C)2003-2008, Bob K Mertz - Some Rights Reserved |
Tuesday, February 13, 2007 |
The good news for the day is that I am feeling slightly better. Last night I was not feeling well at all.... this morning when I woke up, the same was true.... I decided to just relax today until I went to the data center..... being able to just veg and do nothing was really a good thing for me. Oh, and the snow is BEAUTIFUL! There really isn't much else to report.... Happy Singles Awareness Day to everyone tomorrow.... Maybe my future wife will walk into the store tomorrow? *sigh* Really, I just would like any kind of a nice surprise.... just something to let me know that someone is actually thinking of me.... but I'm not keeping my hopes up. Labels: lonely, single, singles awareness, valentine (C)2003-2008, Bob K Mertz - Some Rights Reserved |
Tuesday, September 30, 2003 |
I'm so fed up with everything.... I just want some things to be different... mom just told me that I have to be at my grandmother's house in the morning to help clean it.... this is ... ahh, im gonna try not to swear. I have to work 2-close tommorow and I like to go out to lunch with Jim and Jason and.... dangit... I need a vacation... I cant wait till december for our ski trip... away from everything.... away from mom and dad, away from the tiff crap... just away from everything.... Ahh yes, the tiff stuff.... tonight when I got home from work I had an IM from her that said "please tell me what that was all about" ... I dont know what to say to her... I'm fed up with the situation... Im tired of things starting to look positive and then falling back to the way they were. I'm really starting to think my friends are right and I'm being played... I dont want to believe that but maybe I just need to realize it and move on. Jim has been trying to convince me to go to this "Equally Yoked" place which is for Christian singles... maybe thats what I need to do. Labels: depression, linkin park, single, ski, tiff (C)2003-2008, Bob K Mertz - Some Rights Reserved |
(C)2008, Bob K Mertz - Some Rights Reserved
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